Chapter 15

“Do not be afraid, Abram. I am your shield, your very great reward.” v1

On a number of occasions in Abram’s life God reiterated and expanded his promise to Abram. Usually this occurred after a momentous event when Abram may have been feeling less than safe and very insecure about his future.

Here in Mamre God came to Abram in a vision and reminded him not to be afraid as He is Abram’s shield. His very great reward.

That last bit of the message struck me. 

God is our very great reward.

It is not conquests, achieving goals, making money, getting married, having children and so on. It is God. 

Abram was not so impressed with this promise. God had made a promise that He would make Abram into a mighty nation. And what had come of that? His was childless and a servant in his house was his closest heir.

He heard God say He was Abram’s shield and great reward but he didn’t accept it, because the earlier promise had not come about.

I often say I don’t believe God has great things planned for my life. That a life of difficulty seems to be my lot in life. Here is a time when Abram felt the same.

He doubted God’s promise. He could see many wonderful things God had done for him, but he could also see that the promise that really mattered, an heir, had not come about.

God what can you give me? I remain childless. You have given me no children.

What happened next?

Did God strike Abram down?

Did God berate him?

No.

God reiterated His promise of an heir and took Abram outside. He told him to look up at the sky and count the stars. Which he couldn’t do because there were too many. Then God told Abram that his offspring would be the same. Too many to count.

Abram believed God and God credited it to him as righteousness.

He didn’t punish him for doubting, but rewarded him for believing.

Although he wasn’t finished yet.

Abram was still uncertain. He knew that in the past his belief had faded over time with all the worries in his life. So he asked God for proof.

And God asked him to sacrifice a number of animals and leave them on the altar. After many hours God send a blazing torch to consume the sacrificed animals and established a covenant with Abram that the land he was on would belong to his descendants when they returned to the land from exile. He wasn’t going to see this happen, but God promised it would happen and Abram believed Him.

So God was Abram’s very great reward.

In our lives we don’t necessarily have such amazing encounters with God. We don’t get given special covenants. And that makes it harder to believe in God’s desire to give us good things in life.

Oh we get good things, we just want other good things. Just as Abram had wealth, possessions and success in war and wasn’t content with that, so we want more than we have. 

God may have wonderful things planned for us. Things too wonderful to imagine or believe could happen. But sometimes the things we want are not the things 

God intends us to have.

It would be nice if God made a mighty covenant with us. It would be easier to look forward to the wonderful things that will happen.

But that is not how God works with most of us.

I don’t believe God has wonderful plans for me, but I believe He has given me so much. I might not be wealthy enough to not have to worry about my financial future. But He has given me a house when we didn’t think we would ever afford to buy one again. He has given me 4 beautiful children and a grandchild. He has blessed my children’s lives in many ways. He has led me to a beautiful place to live and given me many wonderful friends and a mighty support network. 

Maybe my business is not as successful as I want it to be. But that might not be God’s plan. 

Maybe I don’t have siblings I can be in contact with, but He has given me friends who are more than my siblings ever were.

Maybe there are a lot of things I want but don’t have. And maybe that is God’s plan.

As always I draw inspiration from David’s writing in the Psalms.

God is my very great reward. And maybe that is enough.

Genesis 14

When I first read this chapter I was confused. 

Here is a story of some wars between different kings. In the process of this war Sodom is overrun. This is where Lot and his family went to live. Lot and everything he owned was taken with the invaders.

One who escaped came to Abram and told him what had happened.

Abram’s response to hearing what had happened to Lot was to line up the servants born in his household (318 men) and take them with him to chase after the invaders. Abram and his men split into small groups and attacked by night, sending the invaders into a withdrawal.

Once Abram’s men had chased the invaders away, they released Lot and his possessions. 

As Abram return to Sodom, the king came out to meet him. Also there was Melchizedek, the king of Salem who was a priest of God. 

Melchizedek blessed Abram by God, Creator of Heaven and Earth. Acknolwedging in the blessing that God had handed the enemies over to Abram.

Abram gave the king of Sodom a tenth of all the recovered plunder, but the king wanted to give Abram the plunder. 

Abram refused to accept the plunder from the king of Sodom. He didn’t want this king to tell people he made Abram rich. 

This confused me and it took some research before I understood why he took this stance. 

The clue is in Melchizedek’s blessing. Abram was blessed by God who handed his enemies over to him. Abram answered only to God, not anyone else. Had he taken the plunder from the king of Sodom then he could be said to have served the king of Sodom and Abram served no one but God.

Abram’s desire was to serve God, not earthly rulers. He was even willing to risk offending the king of Sodom to make his service to God alone clear.

It is a challenge to us to consider who we serve. It is something worth considering over the next week. 

How can I show that God is the one I serve? How can you show that God is the one you serve? 

What does that service look like? Does it involve letting go of doctrine and attitudes that run counter to what God wants you to believe?

I look forward to the answer to that.

I have mentioned in my blogs on occasion that I don’t believe God intends me to have a wonderful life. 

God has given me many wonderful things. I grew up in a house and had enough food to eat. But … There was no love. There was plenty of abuse. There was bullying at school. 

There was a little girl who found solace in nature, in climbing a tree and being comforted by it. In dabbling her toes in the water off the wharf at the end of the road. In watching the clouds make amazing pictures. In walking on the beach in calm and stormy weather. 

God gave me that.

God gave me a wonderful man and together we were given four wonderful children.

He watched over us many times through many crises.

But there were many things that happened that were far from good. Starting with the abusive home I grew up in.

I hate the way that abuse has impacted the way I function at times. The way that has sometimes caused the end of friendships.

I watch how others have stepped confidently into the world. How my own children, raised in love, have achieved so much confidently and with the security of being loved. 

I wish I could have had that. 

I wonder if I have achieved all God intended me to achieve. If I will achieve all God intended me to achieve.

I do know that I survived a traumatic childhood far better than my siblings. Despite all the love they were given they haven’t achieved much in life either. Actually I have achieved more. 

So God gave me resilience and strength that my siblings didn’t have. Being exposed to abuse in their home damaged them in ways it didn’t damage me. I have strengths that they have never had.

I wish I just knew what it was to be loved as a small child. 

I work as a counsellor with those who have suffered trauma in their pasts. I know that my own experience means I “get them” far better than those who have only known love.

That horror has been a gift to help others.

But then I move among a group of amazing women who have achieved so much in life. Some have endured unspeakable horrors yet still achieved so much. And I feel like the dowdy country cousin in their midst because I haven’t achieved what they have. God has given them so much more.

This is the problem with comparison. In John 21:22 Jesus tells Peter that if He wants John to remain alive until He returns it is none of Peter’s business. Peter must follow Jesus. And if I were to ask, Jesus’ answer would be the same. “If I want these beautiful women to know such amazing lives what is that to you? You must follow me.”

Sometimes I wish God had given me a different life. One with less pain and more love. But He didn’t. I don’t know why. I do know that my pain has been a strength I can use to help others. But I still struggle to see a life with more blessings and abundance, as it is portrayed by the “church”, being mine. 

Before industrialisation, European society was based on community. People had connections to community and family. Everyone had the support of that structure. But greed led to some who wanted more and could grab it. Societal structures broke down as people were dragged away from community and family and tried to survive on their own. This was the way Western society and its basis on greed and stockpiling of wealth emerged. It left the structure of the society of Jesus’ time and spread, like a cancer, around the entire world. It led to the destruction of indigenous communities and their cultures based on community and connection.

In my search to understand what God intends my life to be. In my search to understand why I have had to suffer as I have. Why there is only the occasional walk in the beautiful garden. I have been seeking to understand the true God and how God intended us to walk with Him.

One of my considerations has been that who are we to demand a good life. There is no promise in the Bible that this life will be good. After all, for much of the Bible there is much persecution and torment.

But this question about why am I suffering when others don’t is age old. If you read the Psalms you will find David often asking this question of God. Yet time and again he comes back to the one answer. God is God. We worship God. This is not about demanding He give us wonderful lives, it is about worshipping Him. No expectations.

I don’t believe the Western Church has the answer to how we should walk with God. I think it has corrupted the message of God and added layers of tradition that bear more relationship to the endless rules of the Pharisees than to the message of Jesus.

This is why I have started this study of Abram, because that is where God directed me to read.

This is why I believe we all should consider Abram and his story.

Abram was faithful to God but his life was not straightforward. His seeming lack of faith in God when travelling to Egypt and stating Sarai was his sister instead of his wife suggests a man who did not completely trust God. 

What I see in Abram’s story is a man who loved God, but didn’t totally trust Him to give him everything he needed. He recognised God when He came to him and set up altars. He tried to live a life worthy of God, but he didn’t completely trust that God intended him to have a wonderful life.

That Abram is the one I want to know and understand. Because I see I am not the only one in this life who feels that way. I want to be able to “get those people” too and be able to offer hope.

Genesis 13:13-18

Due to an injury I have not been able to write my blog for a few weeks. Next week I will also be unable to write my blog due to family commitments. So today I am writing my blog then again in 2 weeks.

In the last blog I spoke about Abram and Lot going their separate ways, with Lot choosing the seemingly better land.

At the end of verse 12 Lot is described as having taken the whole plain of the Jordan and settling in the cities of the plain, pitching his tent near Sodom.

Verse 13 is an afterthought in the narrative. A very important afterthought. Here it is stated that the people of Sodom were flagrant sinners again God. They were evil and wicked. 

It is interesting to note that at this point in history all people still lived lives that included God in some form. There was no mention of worshipping other gods as is seen when the people left Egypt to return to Canaan. 

All people had the opportunity to have a personal relationship with God that was not bound by religion.

In the verses of Genesis where the story of Abram is told, there are a number of important times when God comes to Abram and makes promises about his future. This is one of them.

He and Lot going there separate ways was an important moment and God marked that by reminding Abram of His promises.

God took Abram and told him to look around. Everywhere to the north, south, east and west would belong to him and his descendants forever. God promises to make his offspring as numerous as the dust of the earth. 

God instructed Abram to walk the length and breadth of the land that God was giving him.

He did this and settled near Mamre at Hebron. After he had pitched his tents, he built and altar to God. He believed God and he honoured God’s promises.

This childless man believed God’s promises. 

When year after year went by without children, it must have been hard for Abram to keep believing those promises. Yet he continued to honour God and believe in his promises.

When we struggle with holding faith in God’s promises it can be so hard to believe God wants our best for our lives. I struggle with that. I love God. I believe in Him. I believe in Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. But I struggle to believe God wants the best for me. 

To have Abram’s faith!

May Abram be a role model for all of us. An encouragement when things feel impossible.